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AGM REPORTS
   (Click on the year to go directly to report)

2013                        (Report by Tim Hardy)                                       19 Apr 2013

2012
                        (Report by Tim Hardy)                                       20 Apr 2012

2011
                        (Report by Tim Hardy)                                       15 Apr 2011

2010
                        (Report by Tim Hardy)                                       07 Oct 2010

2009
                        (Report by Robin "El Pres" L'Oste-Brown)         10 Oct 2009

2007                        (Report by Andrew "Roly" Monk)                       01 Dec 2007

2005                        (Report by Colin "Bomber" Dale)                        26 Nov 2005

2003                        (Report by Steve Jones)                                      06 Dec 2003

2002                        (Report by Colin "Bomber" Dale)                        07 Dec 2002

2001                        (Report by Colin "Bomber" Dale)                        08 Dec 2001
__________________________________________________________________________________________

2013                        (Report by Tim Hardy)                                       19 Apr 2013

HON. SECRETARY'S MINUTES: N.C.C. AGM 2013

Held at: Offices of PP Travel Office, 5 Irving Street, Leicester Square, London, WC2H 7AT

Present (or approximating to): Peter Lennon (in Chair), Steve Werren, Tim Hardy, Mark Robinson, Chris Leckenby, Robin L’Oste-Brown, Rik Andrew, Brett Schwim, Mark Stonehill, Shahna Khan, David Stocks, Steve Jones, Morris Jones, Peter Haley, Peter Hayes, John Edwards, Keith Scott, Andrew Monk, James Culley, Karl Bayer, Carl Hoar and Dale Atkinson (and possibly some other current members arriving unannounced on the night).

1. Apologies …

… were received from the following: Krishneel Goundar, Kunal Vora, Colin Dale, Nick Gamble, Allan Stamper, Nilesh Naidu, Charles Lacey, Darren Moulds, Dick Sutton, Jim Drummond, Steve Bullough, Paul Varney, Mick Stout, Lukey Sparrow, Ash Ditta, Chris Ellegard, Mark Vander, Paul McCubbin, Bruce Balden, Nathan Coleman, Kinnon Brash, Andrew Henville, David Genford, Graham Lawes, Mark Laws, Ron Elliott, Philip Challinor, Nehal Kirmani, Kiat Thoo, Clayton Cook, Tim Carthew, and Merv Dillon (one or two of whom may then have in the event turned up after all for the beer and banter !).

2. Minutes of Last Meeting

    Minutes from the AGM of 20 April 2012 were approved.

3. Season 2012 (Steve Werren)

    Skipper Werren recapped:

       - Played 17 Won 10 Lost 7 Drawn 0 Abandon’d 0 Washout 4

       - 35 Nepos had turned out including no fewer than 10 debutants.

       - 11 players had played more than half. Werren was the only ever-present.

       - Batting: Best Av/Most Runs: Carl Hoar (530 runs @ 44.2).
          Top scores: Shahna Khan 115 (Harrow Weald); Carl Hoar 82* (Beamers). One 100, 13 50s, 11 0s.

       - Bowling: Best Av/Most Wkts: Nilesh Naidu (25 wkts@13.4)

       - Fielding: Steve Werren 15c/7st; Ashish Nagre, Brett Schwim and Lukey Sparrow, 5c each.

       - Trophies: Winners ISIS Trophy (5th in 8yrs)

       - Club Champion: Inaugural Club Champion 2012 – Nilesh Naidu (441 pts),
                                     followed by Carl Hoar (421) and Shahna Khan (333).

Season 2013 (Steve Werren)

         Fixtures:

            - Scheduled (20)
            - New fixtures (2): Three Bridges; Wembley.
            - Restored to List (2): Barnes; Hampstead.
            - Not rebooked (5): Old Manorians; Beamers; Edmonton; Thames Ditton; Metropolitan Line.
            - No date currently available (2): South Hampstead; Northfields.
            - Retained (13): Harrow St Mary’s; Hampton Wick; Northwood; Kew; Shepperton; Teddington; Acton;
               British Airways; Harrow Weald; Hillingdon Manor; Oxford Tour (x2).
            - Vacant dates (3): to accommodate two late confirmers/replacement + one more.


            Availability/Recruitment: Happy news is that 16 of 19 regulars from 2012 season are to remain in the UK
            and most expected to continue playing. 8 potential new recruits have made contact, but only 1 has so far
            appeared at Nets.

            For full summary of 2012 season – see attached sheets.

4. Treasurer’s Report

The Hon Treasurer had previously delivered a Financial Year-end Report to 30 November 2012, which had revealed that the Club had delivered a surplus on the year’s activities of £385.01 compared with £309.15 in 2011. Legends’ subscriptions (£664) were £24 more than the previous year; weekly Match Fees (£484) were down by £36, but overall income at £1,148 was closely comparable to the 2011 income of £1,160.00 total subscriptions. With overall expenditure of £762.99 (major items being, Lord’s Nets, £270; Oxford Tour Pitch Hire/Food, £300; and Match Balls, £130), the practice of raising income in this way since 2008 continued to allow the Club to remain in healthy financial shape. It was predicted that more kit and balls would be required for the 2013 season.

The Hon Treasurer was thanked for his Report and efforts acknowledged on all sides to help ensure subscriptions and match fees continued to be collected.

5. Golf Secretary’s Report

After needing to bail out of the day at West Middlesex GC twelve months earlier despite the new Nepos brollies it was a relief that the day’s golf preceding the AGM had gone … well, swimmingly, again this year. In the event only nine had played, skipper Werren being hors de combat. Stonehenge had won the day with 32 points, a score shared by guest, Geoff Hunt, but who was claiming a higher handicap.

All was set for another great NAGA Tour between 11 and 14 July with Leckers securing the Waterman’s Arms once again for the duration, the courses of Dawlish Warren, Churston Ferrers, Thurlestone and Dainton Park (Ipplepen) all booked.

6. Elections

The Chairman confirmed that the following had all been re-elected:

              - Chairman: Peter Lennon
              - Hon Secretary: Tim Hardy
              - Hon Treasurer: Mark Robinson
              - Club Captain: Steve Werren
              - Club Vice Captain: Carl Hoar
              - Hon Fixtures Secretary: Steve Werren
              - Hon Golf Secretary: Rik Andrew
              - Hon Recruitment Officer: Steve Werren

Stiff competition for the election of the two Ordinary Member places on the Committee saw the incumbents, Chris Ellegard and Jim Eaton being replaced for 2013 by Brett Schwim and James Culley.

7. Any Other Business and Nepotist of the Year 2012

Following due acknowledgment of the kind help of Bomber Dale, Shane and Anita of PP Travel in allowing us to use PP Travel’s offices for our meeting, despite the absence of Mr Dale himself, the meeting was adjourned to allow us to depart to the Malabar Junction for dinner, following which, in time-honoured fashion, nominations for Nepotist of the Year 2012 were circulated and counted.

In equally time-honoured fashion the unsurpassed contribution made by Club Skipper, Fixtures Secretary, Hon. Recruitment Officer, Team Coach, wicketkeeper, Team Coach Driver, Square Leg umpire extraordinaire, musical entertainments officer and provider throughout the season of exemplary (off-field, at least) directions, saw the name of Steve Werren fight off some stiff competition from other nominations but once again triumph for the third successive year, this time ahead of Brett Schwim, who came second in the poll.

Click here to see 'Season Summary' as prepared by Steve Werren.

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__________________________________________________________________________________________

2012                        (Report by Tim Hardy)                                       20 Apr 2012

HON. SECRETARY'S MINUTES: N.C.C. AGM 2012

Held at: Offices of PP Travel Office, 5 Irving Street, Leicester Square, London, WC2H 7AT

Present (or approximating to):
Peter Lennon (in Chair), Steve Werren, Tim Hardy, Mark Robinson, Chris Leckenby, Robin L’Oste-Brown, Rik Andrew, Mark Stonehill, Nilesh Naidu, Steve Jones, Morris Jones, Jim Drummond, Daisy Atkinson, John Edwards, Keith Scott, Philip Challinor, Andrew Monk, Ron Elliott, Bruce Balden, Paul McCubbin, Geoff Hurst, Allan Stamper, Colin Dale, Chris Ellegard, James Culley, Jim Eaton and Ed Greening (and possibly some other current members arriving unannounced on the night).

1. Apologies …

… were received from the following: Carl Hoar, Peter Haley, Charles Lacey, Dick Sutton, David Stocks, Lukey Sparrow, Ash Ditta, Jeremy Mitchell, Mark Exley, Nathan Coleman, Kinnon Brash, Andrew Henville, David Genford, Graham Lawes, Mark Laws, Peter Hayes, Ian Filby, Nigel Astridge, Steve Cocking, Wessel Boshoff, Nehal Kirmani, Mick Walker, Mark Minehan, Kiat Thoo, Clayton Cook, Luke Donnelly, Steve Bullough, Nick Rudgard, Bruce Jackson, Tim Carthew, Blair MacDonald and Merv Dillon (one or two of whom may then have in the event turned up after all for Bomber’s beer !).

2. Minutes of Last Meeting

    Minutes from the AGM of 15 April 2011 were approved.

3. Season 2011 (Steve Werren)

    Skipper Werren recapped:

       - Played 18 Won 11 Lost 6 Drawn 0 Abandon’d 1 Washout 1

       - 42 Nepos had turned out, including no fewer than 18 debutants.

       - 9 players had played no fewer than 12 games each. Werren and Hoar both ever-present.

       - Batting: Avs topped by Merwin Fernando (528 runs @ 75.4) Most runs 647 (Carl Hoar).
         Top scores: Carl Hoar 140* (Nine Bar) and Shahna Khan 131 (Harrow Weald). 16 50’s; 11 0’s.

       - Bowling: Best Av/Most Wkts: Nilesh Naidu (20wkts@18.8)

       - Fielding: S Werren 10ct/5st; N Thacker 7ct

       - Trophies: Winners ISIS Trophy (4th in 7yrs) and Chiswick Twenty20 Big Bash

    Season 2012 (Steve Werren)

         Fixtures:

            - New fixtures: Kew; Beamers.
            - Not rebooked: Epsom (too far, twice cancelled at short notice); South Hampstead (wrong attitude)
            - No date available: Hampstead; Northfields.
            - Club folded: Ealing Wanderers.
            - Retained: Harrow St Mary’s; Hampton Wick; Northwood; Highgate; Teddington; Old Manorians;
              Harrow Weald; Shepperton; Rotten Livers; Oxford Tour (x2).
            - To find: four more.
            - Last 2 games of season + post Oxford Tour will not be pre-booked, but subject to availability.
              No more “time” games. Northwood now finally to be limited overs.

Recruitment: 12 new recruits made contact. 4 already at Nets; 5 more due at Nets next week.

Match fees: For 2012 proposed and carried nem con that match fees be reduced from £10 to £7 with players who drink buying own beers to reflect tight budgets and number of non- drinking players.

Club Champion: Steve Werren embarked upon an heroic attempt to educate and entertain the Members with a discourse upon the merits of establishing the institution of “Club Champion”. Distinct from the inimitable accolade of “Nepotist of the Year”, he proposed that criteria identifying cricketing achievement should be based upon a “performance points” system recognised by among others, the Australian Cricketing Board. Whether or not it was this notion, the suggestion that there would be “consequences” for being dismissed when batting or for conceding runs when bowling, that a series of trophies would need to be purchased to be awarded to backdated winners going back to the year 2000 or that he was still “less than 100% satisfied” with the fine tuning, he was encouraged to devote more attention to the detail before again unleashing such a concept upon the unsuspecting members.

Team/Player of the Century: Ignoring mutterings from disgruntled member Mark Twain, already peed off by an abandoned day’s golf, (“Lies, Damned Lies, now Statistics”) and despite worries that he might be suffering from a “John Buchanan” or “Tugger” moment on the Road to Gallipoli, the skipper embarked upon an even more adventurous discourse upon the virtues of identifying the Team/Player of the Century. Perhaps it is the unfamiliar last word for so many that made the concept as hard for most to grasp as a swirling skyer. Again, despite stoking controversies about the impossibility of comparing rubbish players from different generations, he was left with more work to do.

4. Treasurer’s Report

The Hon Treasurer rose like most financial officers these days, buoyed by the knowledge that he knew things others didn’t. He just wished he knew what they meant. He’d always been uneasy that “double entry” accounting seemed like hitting the ball twice. Still, it was what everyone else did and as they used to say, well, we can’t all be wrong, can we?

He’d even produced a smart Financial Year-end Report to 30 November 2011. On 2 December 2011, no less! Five smart Powerpoint slides in club colours. He hadn’t been sure quite which line had brought the most satisfaction. Frankly, they had all sounded good. “The Nepotists Cricket Club (NCC) delivered a profit on the year’s activities (financial year ends Nov 30th) of £309.15 compared to £52.16 in 2010”; “Both “legend” subscriptions and “Match Fees” were up on 2010 contributing to the £1,160.00 total subscriptions”; “The NCC accounts are in the best shape for a number of years primarily due to the “legends” subs and “Match Fee” process brought in for 2008 – the Captain has religiously pursued this and provided a steady flow of funds into the club.” It never hurt to praise the CEO and people always underestimated what a difference praying made to financial returns.

He had fully endorsed the proposal to reduce match fees to £7. Not to be outdone, he seized the moment to announce to general approval that the Legends’ annual sub would rise to £40. They could afford it. For many of them life was as sweet as one long NAGA Tour. These were good days. Deposits were not even needed from those signing up for the NAGA Tour this summer, but availability did need to be confirmed. As he resumed his seat, his Accounts endorsed, his reputation intact, he wondered why most days weren’t like this. Over his arrangements for last year’s NAGA someone had even emailed: “Liked your spreadie.”

5. Golf Secretary’s Report

Things had not gone so swimmingly that day for the Golf Secretary. OK, it had happened on his watch, but as the hapless Captain of the stricken cruise liner Costa Concordia had discovered only a couple of months earlier, try telling people, “It’s only a bit of water…”. They got most of their money back.

At least he’d not made an exhibition of himself with the coastguard about the evacuation procedures. It was not as if people had not been warned. Would never have happened at all if he’d not been swayed by the tide of people wanting to play just where it suited them, rather than near to where he lived.

It was also not as though they’d not come prepared. They knew full well, well, Fulwell should have known full well not to muck us about and then when West Middx came to our rescue, armed with Leckers’ candystriped brollies, everyone knew the drill, even if “Sunny morning forecast … if a little less sparkling later”, on reflection made him feel a bit like a fish out of … well, like Michael Fish.

Anyway… at least no bandit had won, there’d been fewer bad shots played than usual, more beers drunk and at least one could count on it not raining in July for the NAGA. Everything was marvellously in place for this: 12 to 15 July with Leckers securing the Waterman’s Arms for the duration, the courses of Churston Ferrers, Ipplepen, Thurlestone and Dawlish all to savour and no grumblings about the Launceston Open this year. What could possibly go wrong?

6. Elections

The Chairman confirmed that the following had all been re-elected:

              - Chairman: Peter Lennon
              - Hon Secretary: Tim Hardy
              - Hon Treasurer: Mark Robinson
              - Club Captain: Steve Werren
              - Club Vice Captain: Carl Hoar
              - Hon Golf Secretary: Rik Andrew
              - Hon Recruitment Officer: Steve Werren

To the delight of all assembled and reflecting the rude health of the 2011 and 2012 playing contingent the election of the two Ordinary Member places on the Committee (incumbents, Nilesh Naidu and Dale Atkinson) was contested between Ed Greening, Nilesh Naidu, James Culley, Chris Ellegard and Jim Eaton, with Chris Ellegard and Jim Eaton being duly elected.

7. Any Other Business and Nepotist of the Year 2011

With no other business to detain us from repairing to the Malabar Junction the meeting adjourned for dinner following which in time-honoured fashion, nominations for Nepotist of the Year 2011 were circulated and counted. In equally time-honoured fashion the unsurpassed contribution made by Club Skipper, Fixtures Secretary, Hon. Recruitment Officer, Team Coach, wicketkeeper, Team Coach Driver, Square Leg umpire extraordinaire, musical entertainments officer and provider throughout the season of exemplary (off-field, at least) directions, saw the name of Steve Werren once again posted for posterity.

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__________________________________________________________________________________________

2011                        (Report by Tim Hardy)                                       15 Apr 2011

HON. SECRETARY'S MINUTES: N.C.C. AGM 2011 and 30th ANNIVERSARY DINNER

Held at: Champagne Charlies, 17 The Arches, Villiers Street WC2N 6NG

Present:
Peter Lennon (in Chair), Steve Werren, Tim Hardy, Chris Leckenby, Robin L’Oste-Brown, Rik Andrew, Peter Hayes, Mark Stonehill, Nilesh Naidu, Jeremy Mitchell, Steve Jones, Morris Jones, Jim Drummond, Mark Exley, Daisy Atkinson, Nick Rudgard, John Edwards, Charles Lacey, Peter Haley, Ian Filby, Keith Scott, Philip Challinor, Ash Ditta, Dick Sutton, Andrew Monk, Ron Elliott, David Stocks.

1. Apologies …

… were received from the following: Mark Robinson, Carl Hoar, Colin Dale, Nathan Coleman, Kinnon Brash, Andrew Henville, Karl Bayer, Graham Lawes, Mark Laws, Lukey Sparrow, Steve Cocking, Wessel Boshoff, Nehal Kirmani, Chris Ellegard, Mick Walker, Mark Minehan, Kiat Thoo, Allan Stamper, Bruce Balden, John Argent, Luke Donnelly, Steve Bullough and Merv Dillon.

… and a Welcome to Returning Legends

… was particularly extended to former Nepos Skipper, Charles Lacey, and other Legends not seen for some time: Messrs Ditta, Edwards, Exley, Filby and Rudgard.

2. Minutes of Last Meeting

Minutes from the meeting of 7 October 2010 were approved.

3. Season 2011 (Steve Werren)

Skipper Werren reported upon the state of the upcoming 2011 fixtures and recruitment efforts to help honour them.

Fixtures: The 2005 EGM “Evolution Fixture Plan” designed to reduce the number of games outside the M25 was now completed. For the 2011 season, save for the Oxford Tour and the Devon Golf weekend, all fixtures (19 matches in all) were scheduled within the M25. 12 had been retained from 2010. Whitchurch, Old Woking and Sutton had been dropped on account of distance; Ealing, Acton and Finchley as too strong; and Hounslow for failing last year to show up. Valley End had dropped us. Four new fixtures were arranged with Harrow St Mary’s, Old Manorians, Harrow Weald and Rotten Livers. Three fixtures were still to be found. No game would be fixed for the Golf weekend in the hope that some Young Guns might be encouraged to attend. We have been invited to participate in a Twenty20 mini tournament on a free Sunday by Ealing Wanderers.

Recruitment: Ad on the Gumtree website now encourages British players as well as visiting other nationals, reflecting the need for some longer-term players. 26 new recruits have been signed up from Gumtree and other sources, 12 of whom have already attended pre-season Nets, the best-attended for years. Seven 2010 regulars have also appeared at Nets: Werren, Hoar, Naidu, Coleman, Ellegard, Thoo and Hardy, so things looking promising. Having one bowler at 6’10” and two measuring 6’5” should help unnerve oppositions, at least until we start playing.

Ashes Tour: The skipper closed by distributing the stats from the successful Winter Ashes Tour and was thanked by the meeting for his continued inspiring and energetic leadership.

The Golf Secretary rose very appropriately to make a speech acknowledging the Club’s huge thanks for the tremendous hospitality extended by the large contingent of Aussie Nepos to all touring Nepos Down Under. The tour had been a huge success. An album of photos from the memorable tour was circulated. A number of photos were projected onto a screen to provide a fitting backdrop to the Dinner. It was one of the best and most memorable achievements in the Club’s 30+ year history.

4. Treasurer’s Report

In any less well-regulated Club it would be a potential worry in a time of economic uncertainty to find one’s Club’s Treasurer out of the jurisdiction on the one day that he is called upon to account for the Club’s financial health. It was however reported that from his offshore lair, Stoney had calmed the markets’ jitters by providing a spreadsheet from which the analysts were satisfied that in 2010 the Club had made a reassuring surplus of £52.16, compared with £334.50 in 2009 and £80.14 in 2008.

It was observed that a tell-tale sign of the misdemeanours of Madoff – not (yet at least) our former banker Treasurer’s “nick” name, i.e. a term serving those serving terms with “inside” knowledge – was that he had posted consistently and suspiciously market-beating results year-on-year. Either Stoney was straighter, like his bowling, or smarter, unlike his batting, than Madoff or perhaps the Club was genuinely reaping the dividends of the Chairman’s professional advice that the Legends were better off making charitable donations in the form of Club subscriptions than allow the HMRC simply to squander their ill-gotten baby-booming gains. Or, perhaps the skipper’s money-laundering activities in terms of gathering in the Young Guns’ previous night’s casino winnings in the form of matchday fees genuinely were outstripping the ever-spiralling collective costs of pitch hire, teas, CCC subs and the acquisition and recycling of a carbon-neutral rubbish cricket ball mountain.

A murmur of quiet satisfaction greeted the delivery of the absent Treasurer’s Report with an audible sigh of relief (or perhaps that was just our President making room for his next course) that unlike some other long-established, two-toned institutions to which we have been not unreasonably likened (given the renowned collective wisdom of our members) we had not (yet) seen, perhaps helped by being a wandering side, any recent internal strife over whether to mortgage to the hilt the future of any next generation by overly grandiose ground development or hotel building proposals. [The subsequent unavailability of the Holbeton Hilton and the difficulty of the Juggler to find a bed have however both been cause for some of us to have endured more than the occasional sleepless night over the last year worrying about what might lie ahead - or in a neighbouring bed.]

5. Golf Secretary’s Report

Mr Rik reported that a successful NAGA golf outing had been conducted around the “short, but tight” holes of Hampstead GC earlier in the day. Ten Nepos had participated with Stocks emerging by the end as the early leader of the 2011 Order of Merit. The pre-event favourite, the Juggler, who scored an impressive 375 yard birdie three on the opening 258 yard first hole was ultimately stymied by a course for which the Golf Sec considered him ill-suited (“he’s long, but tight”). Naidu and Werren, despite it being too early in the day even to try to get tight, came a creditable second and third respectively.

The dates for the second NAGA outing, the Tour, were confirmed as Thursday to Monday (14-18 July). HQ would again be the Holbeton Hilton. Rounds in prospect were: Teignmouth; Thurlestone; Launceston; Bigbury; and possibly Burnham & Berrow.

6. Elections

The Chairman confirmed that the following had all been re-elected:

              - Chairman: Peter Lennon
              - Hon Secretary: Tim Hardy
              - Hon Treasurer: Mark Robinson
              - Club Captain: Steve Werren
              - Club Vice Captain: Carl Hoar
              - Hon Fixtures Secretary: Steve Werren
              - Hon Golf Secretary: Rik Andrew
              - Hon Recruitment Officer: Steve Werren
              - Ordinary Member: Dale Atkinson

Nilesh Naidu was elected as the second Ordinary Member to succeed Nathan Coleman.

7. Nepotist of the Year 2010

In light of the exceptional contribution made by Club Skipper, Fixtures Secretary, Hon. Recruitment Officer, Team Coach, Team Coach Driver, Square Leg umpire extraordinaire, musical entertainments officer and provider throughout the season of exemplary directions worthy of any savvy sat nav app, all duly recognised at last October’s Committee meeting, Steve Werren was overwhelmingly voted in as Nepotist of the Year 2010.

8. Any Other Business

The Club’s first ever Captain and principal founder, Stephen Jones stirringly led the toasts to the health of the Club, without satisfactorily resolving the doubts in the minds of many younger members (mainly absent) about whether the origins of the Club were to be explained as being the creative work of the Almighty or some higher authority; the result of a demographic exodus in the late 1970s from the more deprived, more northerly, parts of England; a Big Bang; the consequence of natural evolution or selection; or had simply been a spectacular unexplained freakish phenomenon of rampant Nepotism.

Amid barely contained scenes of nostalgia, delirium and advanced signs of Alzheimer’s, various Nepos rose to their feet at different intervals struggling to recall their reason for doing so, never mind the finest moments of the Nepos’ first Thirty Years.

Skipper Werren has made a major contribution with the website of compiling for posterity many of the statistical landmarks. Fun has been had seeking to recall or recreate some of the most cherished non-cricketing moments. Despite some half-hearted efforts formally to record the official history of the Club, there is after all perhaps much to commend many matters being left confined to the stuff of myths and Legends. The former to be promulgated over the coming years by the latter as they shuffle down the “corridors of uncertainty” of licensed premises or more secure medical institutions, to the sound of creaking joints, or in the case of Leckers and those in his wake, squeaking ones.

To cries of “Thirty More Years” a group photo was taken before all assembled were decanted into the night, some to be found several hours later still failing to pot the cue ball in the Oxford & Cambridge snooker room, failing to engage (or even disengage) a Boris bike, failing to find, never mind occupy, intended beds or blaming “Challinor” for the fact that they were still in NW1 without sleep, eating a full English and wearing long hose, but also a kilt, only two hours before they were due for a match on the first tee at Moor Park GC on a day remembered (also remembered, but perhaps more wistfully, by their wife) as being their blessed wedding anniversary.

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__________________________________________________________________________________________

2010                        (Report by Tim Hardy)                                       07 Oct 2010

HON. SECRETARY'S MINUTES: N.C.C. COMMITTEE MEETING  2010

Held at: Offices of PP Travel Office, 5 Irving Street, Leicester Square, London, WC2H 7AT

Present:
Chris Leckenby (in Chair), Steve Werren, Tim Hardy, Mark Robinson, Robin L’Oste-Brown, Nathan Coleman, Rik Andrew, Colin Dale, Peter Hayes, Andrew Main, Mark Stonehill, Nilesh Naidu,
Jeremy Mitchell, Morris Jones, Jim Drummond.

1. Apologies

Received from the following: Carl Hoar, David Stocks, Peter Haley, Kinnon Brash, Andrew Henville, Karl Bayer, Keith Scott, Graham Lawes, Lukey Sparrow, Steve Cocking, Wessel Boshoff, Nehal Kirmani, Chris Ellegard, Mick Walker, Peter Lennon, Mark Minehan, Steve Jones, Andrew Monk, Kiat Thoo, Allan Stamper, Ron Elliott, Bruce Balden, Luke Donnelly, Merv Dillon and Dick Sutton.

2. Captain’s Overview of Season 2010 (Steve Werren)

Steve Werren reported on Season 2010, which was not yet concluded with three Ashes fixtures still to be played Down Under. Of the 20 matches scheduled for the English Summer the outcome was: P14 - W6 - L6 - D2 - Abandoned 1 - Washout/Cancelled 5.

The season saw matches enjoyed and played in a good spirit. There were also some remarkable highlights. A ten-wicket victory over a strong Middlesex League team, South Hampstead, saw Nehal Kirmani (147*) and Lukey Sparrow (72*) post a Nepos world record 1st wicket undefeated stand of 236* for victory.

Carl Hoar scored the only other 100 of the season (130 at Valley End). Three scores in the 90s: David Stocks (99 v Ealing Wanderers), Chris Ellegard (93 v Nine Bar) and Carl Hoar (90* v Northwood). Chris Ellegard topped the batting averages with an average of 77.6 (388 runs in 5 completed innings). Carl Hoar top scored with 516 runs in 9 completed innings (av. 57.3).

Bowling honours were shared between Lukey Sparrow (best average: 12.4 – 12 wkts for 149 runs, best economy and best strike rate) and Chris Ellegard (most wickets – 13).

45 players were used in 2010 (against 60 in 2009) with Steve Werren an ever-present, taking most catches (10, plus 2 stumpings) and donning the most NACAs (3).

Less happily, availability remained a major problem all season long. Legends were less available than in earlier years. Young Gun Antipodeans actually went travelling this year rather than simply talking about doing so while playing cricket. Far too many (from both camps) were guilty of persistently failing to declare availability in advance or to acknowledge Steve’s emails. Very disappointing. Fixture issues to be discussed below.

3. Treasurer’s Overview on Tours (NAGA and ISIS) and Finances (Mark Robinson)

The Treasurer reported upon the huge (and deficit-free) success of both the well-attended NAGA Tour (based at Holbeton – 17 players attended over 5 days/4 nights) and the ISIS Trophy weekend, even if the retention of the latter was memorably denied us owing to a “schoolboy error” in bat-grounding techniques on the part of the Club’s senior pro and most highly-qualified coach. The Treasurer was at the time experiencing schoolboy fantasies of his own at the other end, dreaming of hitting Woody back over his head for six and the trophy. Stoney’s chiselled good looks will therefore not (yet) be memorialised in sculpted Oxfordshire stone and placed on a plinth at the Queen’s College ground.

The late-night chiselling of Peter Haley’s looks meanwhile took the form of a mixed media work (wet beer/dry wall/Australian Good Samaritan) and a novel, one-man re-enactment of the Monty Python “falling architect’s sketch”. Daisy Atkinson suffered the double misfortune of taking two catches of a lifetime in the presence of the film cameras only for Club cameraman, Carl (call me “Arsene”) Hoar, who so masterfully captured Bomber’s earlier hat-trick, failing to see or record anything for posterity.

The wish to have such Legendary accomplishments passed down through the generations probably explains the Treasurer’s call for more younger members to be encouraged to participate in each of the NAGA and ISIS tours next year.

£1,000 or thereabouts had been collected into the NCC coffers over the year and duly spent. Congratulations were recorded for Steve Werren’s success in collecting match fees from non-subscription-paying 2010 players through the season which greatly helped the Club to keep on an even financial keel.

4. Ashes Tour 2010/11 Preview and matters arising (Steve Werren)

Steve Werren reported on the plans for the Nepos Down Under. Four Nepos Legends (Steve Jones, Chris Leckenby, Robin L’Oste-Brown and Rik Andrew) and their spouses were to be joined by Steve Werren, Stoney Robinson and Tum Carthew (from NZ) to complement the rich pool of Australian-based Nepotist talent to honour, so far three, fixtures in prospect. Daisy Atkinson was volunteering assistance regarding an Adelaide-based match and Bomber was busy arranging a Christmas Eve fixture and hospitality in Melbourne.

5. Arrangements for AGM and 30th Anniversary Dinner 2011 (Tim Hardy)

Tim Hardy reported on the latest plans regarding a 30th Anniversary Dinner, now to be held pre-season in 2011, when we would also stage our AGM. An expensive location would be avoided to help attract as large a number of Nepos past and present as possible. Availability/preferences for a Friday or Saturday over two weekends in early April and interest in golf beforehand would be canvassed. Every effort ought to be made to try to round up a good attendance and assorted memorabilia from down the years. The occasion could also serve as a pre-season boost to the club and a chance to hear some war stories from the Ashes campaign.

6. Season 2011 (Steve Werren)

Fixtures-wise the Club remains in a transitional stage. The bulk of the team in 2011 is likely again to comprise youngish Antipodeans without cars. Easy access to public transport for timely arrivals and departures relieving Steve of having to make an arduous shuttle run is a high priority in choosing fixtures. In consequence, the likes of Whitchurch and Old Woking will be dropped.

Opting for inner London fixtures poses other problems. Some clubs are very strong. While at our strongest we can match many, with a weakened side we face serious mismatches. Washouts against Acton, Finchley and Epsom and a remarkable win against South Hampstead spared us potentially considerable embarrassment. Explaining to strong clubs our likely strength and arranging some matches for later in the season when availability may be more reliable are two plans for next season.

Steve is willing to continue the work of compiling the 2011 fixtures but would appreciate help from all members in proposing to him new potential sides which meet these criteria. He would then welcome passing on the mantle to someone else with a fixture list which essentially meets our requirements.

Steve will again serve as the Club’s recruiting officer via Gumtree etc, but will be receiving help from Carl looking to approach prospective players at the winter Oval indoor nets, which have not as yet proved a good hunting ground.

7. NAGA Tour 2011 (Rik Andrew)

Everyone had considered the NAGA Tour 2010 to have been a resounding success. The most pressing questions regarding the Tour in 2011 were whether to make over 5 days/4 nights, whether to combine with a T20 cricket game at Holbeton and the choice of courses, especially any links golf to be added. Further emails were to be relayed to canvass views from all interested with view to settling an itinerary before departures Down Under.

8. Any other business

Before everyone repaired to Malabar Junction, grateful thanks were expressed to Bomber and PP Travel for their fine hospitality. Also, for the beer and other leftovers from the Munich
Oktoberfest and for Mr Rik’s Real Ale supplements.

No mention needs to be made of Bomber’s lederhosen, though the minds of many may have turned wistfully to the attractive sound of willow on leather... Perhaps the only surprise was that they were not in pink and green. We must ask Carl to have a word with some Viennese suppliers...

                                                                                *****
At Malabar Junction a small presentation was made to Steve Werren on behalf of the Nepo's in appreciation and recognition of the exceptional lengths to which he had personally gone to allow the 2010 season to happen at all, never mind provide so many enjoyable days of cricket.

                                                                                *****
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2009                        (Report by Robin "El Pres" L'Oste-Brown)          10 Oct 2009

HON. SECRETARY'S MINUTES: N.C.C. AGM 2009

Held at: Offices of PP Travel Office, 5 Irving Street, Leicester Square, London, WC2H 7AT

1. Apologies
The acting Chairman (Derek ‘Lec’ Leckenby) opened the meeting with apologies from virtually every member of the committee who were unable to attend due to various prior engagements. He explained that he would Chair the meeting and that the Pres would be presenting the Treasurers report and also acting as Secretary to the meeting.

2. Captain’s Report
Dale Atkinson reviewed the season describing it as being ‘fantastic’ with more wins than losses. He stated his intention to stand down adding that it had been a pleasure to Captain the side for the past three years and expressed his thanks for everyone’s support.

3. Fixture Secretary’s Report
Jeff Critchley reported that we had achieved 19 playing dates in the previous season and that he had only had to go to the conference on 4 or 5 occasions. The only difficulty being what standard to report the side as (poor or piss poor!!). He added that preparations were well in hand for 2010 with 7 contacts already made but, as he will be returning to Aus shortly he would also have to stand down.

4. Treasurer’s Report
The Pres presented the report prepared by Stoney which represented a forecast position at the end of November 2009. In summary, there had been little financial activity with income (£852) outstripping expenditure (£610) to create a net profit of £242 – the highest in recent times! However, this was only made possible by the fact that we had spent nothing on kit something we will definitely need to do next season. It was proposed that subscriptions for 2010 should remain unchanged with the Annual Subs at £40 and Match Day Fees of £10. This proposal was unanimously accepted.  When queried as to who had paid in 2009 (name and shame) the Pres read the list from the draft accounts. This prompted spontaneous opening of wallets and the Pres was presented with a total of £200 for 2010 subs from: Stocker, Transport, Tim, Buddy and Derek.

5. Season Summary and Nepotists World Records
Steve Werren presented the meeting with the season’s summary (Played 18, Won 10, Lost 8, Washout/Cancelled 2) and the averages. Steve will make these available to all shortly. He also gave an overview of the Nepotists World Records giving a fascinating and comprehensive insight into 30 years of Nepotists history – surprising many of the older members with information about themselves they had long forgotten!!

6. Elections
The following elections were made or confirmed:
    Chairman                           Peter Lennon
    Hon. Secretary                   Tim Hardy
    Hon. Treasurer                   Mark Robinson
    Club Captain                      Steve Werren (Note: Carl Hoar was also seen as a strong candidate and was
                                              appointed Vice Captain to assist Steve and gain experience)
    Hon. Fixtures Secretary      Mark "Transport" Minehan will commence as fixture secretary, organising the bulk of the
                                              games over the winter and conclude his tenure end of March; at which point he will return
                                              to Australia. Steve Werren will then take over the reigns for the remainder of the season.
    Hon. Golf Secretary           Rik Andrew
    Hon. Recruitment Officer    Steve Werren
    Ordinary Members             Nathan Coleman
                                              Dale Atkinson

7. AOB

Nepo Legends Christmas Dinner – It was agreed that there would still be a strong interest in a Christmas Dinner and Buddy Hayes agreed to try and organise something for December

Recruitment – The potential of a ‘Boot Camp Day’ was discussed with Tim Hardy and Buddy Hayes strongly supporting the concept. It was agreed that this should be discussed at a future committee meeting (to be arranged)

30th Anniversary Match – Steve Werren suggested a 30th anniversary celebration match should be arranged for early May (8th or 10th), possibly against Carshalton or alternatively an original Nepo vs. current Nepos. Again it was agreed that this should be discussed at a future committee meeting (tba).

Nepo Numbers – Steve Werren suggested Nepos should be numbered according to when they joined the club and first played (ie) Those that played in the inaugural match would display No. 1). Number to be displayed on caps and shirts. Proposal was accepted unanimously.

Nets – It was agreed to stick with two nets per night aiming for around 8-9 pm.

Thanks  - Finally, and most importantly, Tim Hardy proposed a vote of thanks to Dale, Steve, Jeff and Carl for their outstanding contribution to the club over the last season. This was, obviously, unanimously agreed and Dale Atkinson was presented with a small token of the club’s appreciation for the manful contribution he has made to the Club as Captain for the last 3 years.

Nepo of the Year.  In an extremely close vote-off over the curry, Carl Hoar was named Nepotist of the Year.

Post Meeting Note – From the acting committee many thanks indeed to Bomber and Transport for the use of PP facilities and the excellent ‘light’ refreshments during the meeting.

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2007                        (Report by Andrew "Roly" Monk)                        01 Dec 2007

HON. SECRETARY'S MINUTES: N.C.C. AGM 2007


Held at: The Grosvenor Arms, 2 Grosvenor Street, Mayfair, London, W1K 4PT

1. Attendees
Lt. Cdr. Robin L 'Oste Brown RN (Retired) NVQ (Electronics), Peter Lennon, Mark Robinson, Buddy Hayes, Steve Jones, Maurice Jones, Mark Stonehill, Andrew Monk, Geoff Critchley, JeffDillon, Oliver Paterson, Nick Ovenden (Candidate), Chris Leckenby, Tim Hardy, Rik Andrew (Eh), T Ransport, Clayton Cooke, Bruce Balden, Matt Ress, Max Walker, Peter Hayley.

2. Apologies
Bomber Dale, Bruce Jackson, Wisden, Funky, Lewis Mapperson, Steve Werren, Daisy Atkinson, Carl Hoar.

3. No Show
Kenny Worrall

4. Fixtures Secretary Report
a.
'In 2007 TGTIWHES won 8 of the 14 scheduled fixtures' and so began the final address to the floor from the soon to be repatriated Merv Dillon. He reported that two new fixtures had been arranged and enjoyed against Old Tennisonians and Mixed Caribbean. Morris Jones raised the prospect of playing the Piccadilly Line again. Old Woking was another new fixture, but they were pants and not near a station.

b. Then came the moment we had all been waiting for, Merv mentioned the tour! Obviously Mr Rik took over at this point, Eh. He stated that 2007 had been a tour saved by rain as we only had 7 available for the Budleigh game. He proposed going to watch the Open instead and all of us staying with Steve Jones. Steve mumbled something the secretary did not catch but apparently concerned bicycles and impossible physiological exertions. We have been offered Budleigh in June and have accepted the fixture. A coach to the coast was muted. Steve Jones stated that Budleigh is now our oldest fixture and it should be kept going.

c. Merv offered his resignation along with advice for the new incumbent stating it was an easy job and not at all tricky to keep a group of characters such as the Nepotists happy. He expected a flood of volunteers for the position and to make it even more attractive produced a new Fix Sec shirt in club livery. .

d. The Chairman made a prolonged address thanking Merv for his service in the position over the years. Merv replied with the now legendary phrase "Cheers mate, but tonight is all about cricket.

5. Treasurers Report
a.
Mark Robinson took the floor and immediately the mood of the meeting changed as he went on and on about credit crunches, dark days ahead and the impact the Northern Rock situation would have on club finances. He said we were £500 in credit but owed most of it to the Grosvenor Arms! This left us £21 in the black.

b. To change matters he had appointed Derek 'Lec' Leckenby to be Guy of Gisboume to Stoney's Sheriff of Nottingham. Together they would terrorise the members present this evening into paying their subs.

c. He proposed we abolish the two tier system of subs and go for a straight £40 per year with a £10 match fee. Any new player would be given a couple of games to bed in and then the skipper would have a financial "word in the ear" .

d. Life memberships would also be available at £500 to include a Nepotist Names shirt and mention in the fixture card. Stoney was immediately inundated with Life Membership applications!

e. The vote on these changes was as follows; For 11, against 1, abstained 10. CARRIED

6. Captain's Report
With the skipper, Daisy, down under for Funky's wedding, Roly was rather foolishly asked to make a proxy presentation. This went on and on for some time but the key phrases included; Twenty seventh and wettest summer for TGTTWHES.....carbon footprint.....wandering side.....tour with no cricket.....first post Jackson season.....first with a reduced or fun size fixture list.....55 players wore Lime Green and Magenta in '07.....unbeaten until August 12th.....only 5 players played in 50% or more of the fixtures.....P l3
W7 D1 L5.....Bessy topped averages with 55.8.....Tons for Bessy, Max and Daisy.....Other statistical highlights included Clay, Stoney, Hannibal and The President all averaging less than 3.3.....Mr Rik led the wicket takers with 14.....Max top of bowling stats with 13 at 20.1.....7 catches for Jeff.....8 Nepo's in Paris for the RWC final.....new baby Nepo for Deeeeek.....Bomber awarded NACA in Tasmania on morning of the dinner to Funky at his wedding.....Bomber ejected from wedding for setting fire to bride's dress whilst presenting NACA.....best wishes to Merv and Sarah down under.

7. Election of Officers
Post Elected:
    Chairman                  Peter Lennon
    Hon Sec                   RolyMonk
    Fixture Sec               Jeff Critchley
    Treasurer                  Stoney Robinson
    Cricket Captain         Daisy Atkinson
    NAGA Captain         Mr Rik
    Ordinary Members    Clay Cooke, Max Walker

8. Nepotist of the Year 2007
After a very close vote off including satellite links with Tasmania and The Gold Coast the 2007 Nepotist of the year award went to......MERV!

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2005                        (Report by Colin "Bomber" Dale)                         26 Nov 2005

HON. SECRETARY'S MINUTES: N.C.C. AGM 2005

Held at: Hard Rock Casino, Piccadilly Circus, London

‘TIGER TIM’ TRIUMPHS IN NEPO OF THE YEAR VOTE OFF!!

Averaging just 4.3 with the bat. Four ducks. 11 innings that produced just 43 runs. 10th and last on the qualified batting list. There could only be one choice for 2005 Nepo of the Year … come on down Tim Hardy!!!

Yes, only 25 years since he first hit (or was that snicked) the ball in anger for the mighty Nepotists CC, Tim has walked away with one of the cricket world’s highest honours. And typically the vote was not without it’s usual drama…

The culmination of the gala 2005 NCC AGM held at the Hard Rock Casino saw a vote off after a tie between Tim and Geoff “Merv” Dillon, both of whom threw off a determined early challenge by your correspondent. Merv, the Hon Fixture Secretary, who ended up the season as joint leading wicket taker and hitting over 200 runs at a paltry 68.3, really never stood a chance.

2005 really belonged to Tim and his legendary support crew - Angie. Miles and miles were driven in search of that big innings. Yet like a true trooper, never once did Tiger Tim complain when things did not go quite as one hoped. It was all about how you play the game and about enjoying it with your mates.

Tim Hardy, you are a Nepotist Legend!!

Another highly successful AGM began earlier at a champagne reception at the prestigious Leicester Square offices of PP Travel. Cocktails met the world’s greatest cricket team upon arrival at the Hard Rock and from then on, it is all a bit hazy…

The meeting began with a special report of September’s EGM presented by Bomber, Funky and Merv. Bomber first of all toasted the “Nepo Breed to Exist” policy which as been working its ar.. off. 2005 saw the production of three Nepo BOYS – Curtis Jackson, Arthur Monk and (super) Freddie Stocks – to be renamed Inzaman???

Bomber back-grounded the reasons for his call for an EGM, the consensus reached for the “evolution not revolution” plan to fixture changes and made an impassioned plea for members to take up the challenge to keep the NCC strong or at least, a going concern: “We all agree we have something special with the Nepos and it is up to everyone to make sure it continues”.

Luke Funky Donnelly said he would again be standing as Club Captain, but would be assisted by “match owners”. These included Roly (Valley End), Stoney (the Oxford Weekend), Stocker said he would do two matches and maybe Chook and Daisy. Bomber would stand again as tour captain.

Stevie Werren had been appointed as “recruitment officer” to work specifically at attracting new Nepos. There are to be extra nets and Roly Monk returns as “legends co-ordinator”, to attempt to drag more Nepo dinosaurs to matches.

Tour 2006 looked set to stay at Holberton, although there was a feeling that a change would be good. But this was unlikely to happen until 2007. Stevie Werren (via email as absent from the AGM as back in Oz) – stated that as long as the AGM felt there was a need for a change – he would research a Newquay option for 2007. Mr Rik called for the date for the 2006 tour to be moved back one weekend as it clashed with Eng v Pak at Lords. No vote was held on this and this debate is doing the rounds.

The Hon Fixture Secretary elaborated on the “evolution” fixture plan agreed at the EGM. Over a number of seasons the plan was to gradually reduce the number of distance (outside M25 games) to make it easier for younger, mainly antipodean playing members to attend.

Merv said that in 2006 the plan was to reduce the fixture list from 20 games plus tour to 16 matches plus tour. The season would start two weeks later after the 1st May Bank Holiday and end a week earlier. 8 fixtures have been earmarked to be gradually replaced: In no order: Frensham, Oxford Downs, Wellington, Checkendon, Elstree, Whitchurch, Reigate and Shamley.

Election of Officers for the 2006 season moved quickly as the meeting backed the plans made at the EGM.

Chairman. Peter Lennon. Re elected.
Club Captain – Luke Donnelly Re elected.
Match “owners” – concept approved by meeting
Tour captain – Bomber. Re elected.
Hon. Treasurer – Jacko. Re elected.
Hon. Fixtures Secretary. Merv. Re elected.
Hon. Recruitment officer – Stevie Werren. Elected.
Hon. Nepotist “Legends” co-ordinator (Legends Overseer Manager - Leg Over Man for short?). Roly. Elected.
Golf Secretary. Mr Rik. Re elected.
Ordinary Members: Elected: Buddy and Daisy.

Note: No position of Hon Secretary was put forward or voted on. Basically some else next year will have to organise the AGM.

Stats and accounts: These were presented by the Hon Treasurer Jacko. The funds in the NCC account were just £200. 2006 subs are £45 for playing members and £25 for social members.

2005 season stats honours are:

Batting:

Averages: Roly Monk 114.7. Runs scored 344.

Most runs scored: Jacko. 570 at 81.4. Includes new club record of 196.

Bowling:

Averages: Chook Henville. 14 wickets at 14.6

Most wickets: Bomber Dale (LPK): 23 at 20.1 and Merv Dillon 23 at 16.6.

The meeting was adjourned around 1am as extreme haziness set in. The lucky p…ski croupiers then took over in the fleecing of the poor hazy remaining Nepos downstairs.

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2003                        (Report by Steve Jones)                                       06 Dec 2003

HON. SECRETARY'S MINUTES: N.C.C. AGM 2003

Held at: The Coopers Arms, 87 Flood St, Chelsea, London SW3 5TB

"LATE SPRINT BY DADDY STOCKS CLINCHES NEPO OF THEY YEAR TITLE WITH SUTTON NO WHERE TO BE SEEN AS N.C.C. PLUNGE TO RECORD FINANCIAL LOSS"

A trend is emerging in the voting habits for the prestigious title of Nepo of the Year with another close vote swung by the fatherhood factor. At least his time the happy event did not coincide with the Nepo's main event. Daddy Stocks was heard to say that he had always had wonderful timing and surely a season with the bat of just short of 1,000 runs is ample testimony.

Stocks took an early lead (4) in the NOTY voting but was then pegged back by Stoney IDS (3), surely a sympathy vote, and a true Nepotistic surge for Jones Minor (3), before a late rally clinched the title with 6 votes. There were too many people to mention with 1 vote.

Your stand-in scribe and Hon Treasurer were both shocked by the treatment of Dick Sutton who despite being the most successful captain of the year and featuring in the top 3 of both batting and bowling, he did not receive a single vote for NOTY. No change there then.

Earlier 18 Nepotists and a guest of Roly's attended the meeting. A shocked AGM was stunned to learn that Jones Minor had been forbidden by his wife from attending as he had severely overdrawn his brownie points by spending 2 weeks in Australia watching England thrash the Aussies to win the Rugby World Cup. Tough choice really, see England win in Sydney or go to the AGM?

It was at this juncture that Chairman Lennon called the meeting to order and as the Hon Sec Bomber Dale was absent he asked your stand in scribe to take the minutes because I was seated to his left and had my own pen.

OFFICER'S REPORTS:

HON. SECRETARY:

As Bomber was off searching foreign fields for edible hats (only my second reference, as yet, to England winning the Rugby World Cup) he was not able to deliver his report. The minutes of the 2002 AGM had been posted on the N.C.C Website but no one had thought to take copies for this meeting. The minutes were therefore approved in absentia.

HON. TREASURER'S REPORT:

Jacko issued a P&L and Balance Sheet for the year ending 30th November 2003 and a stunned meeting was not entirely placated when the Treasurer dismissed the loss of £678.81 as "within forecast" owing to the purchase of shirts. N.C.C. still had positive net assets, but reduced to £755.23. There were several silly questions about the club's finances but none of significance. The Accounts were approved as issued.

The subscriptions had not been increased last year, but in the spirit of New Labour, Jacko proposed not to increase them again. Full subs for 2004 of £40 and country subs of £20 were approved unanimously.

HON. FIXTURE SECRETARY'S REPORT:

Stoney, aka IDS, issued a fixture list and the Quiet Man was proud to point out that:

· Lords nets confirmed for Tuesdays at 8.00 pm from 23rd March to 20th April
· A record 22 fixtures arranged with 13 already confirmed
· Tour will be Friday 16th to Sunday 18th July, against Holbeton, inter-house match at Wembury and Budleigh on Sunday
· Isis Trophy weekend has moved to 21st/22nd August (Oval meeting is Friday 20th for the Windies, so could be a great weekend. Nearly as good as that weekend in Sydney when England won the Rugby World Cup)

The Chairman commended Stoney for an excellent job, but in true IDS style, to the strains of one more year, he unconditionally resigned and refused to stand again. The Chairman asked for and received a generous round of applause for Stoney's efforts for the club.

GOLF SECRETARY REPORT:

Clearly at great expense Mr Rik had purchased a magnificent glass trophy for the NAGA that for 2003 was won by Steve Sombrero Werren, largely based on a massive 43 point at St Mellion on the Friday of tour. Mr Rik droned on about possible fixtures but was shouted down without conclusion. He promised to e-mail the dates soon. Incidentally the NAGA trophy is not as magnificent as the one lifted by Martin Johnson for England winning the Rugby World Cup in Sydney.

ELECTION OF OFFICERS FOR THE 2004 SEASON

CHAIRMAN: Peter Lennon confirmed he was happy to stand again and was nominated by Roly Monk and seconded by IDS. Breaking with every tradition of the club, controversially, an antipodean backlash, probably rooted in England winning the Rugby World Cup in Sydney, saw Luke Lazarus Donnelly, proposed by Steve Werren and seconded by Merv 3 bats Dillon.

After a short discussion led by Buddy Hayes, order was restored when it was agreed that it would be inappropriate and un-Nepotistic to have a contested election for Chairman. Luke Donnelly's nomination was therefore not accepted by the meeting. Peter Lennon was therefore elected Chairman sort of unopposed.

CLUB CAPTAIN: The meeting spontaneously broke out into a discussion of whether a club captain was needed at all. However, sense prevailed, at least in respect of deciding to keep the post, and Roly Monk, incumbent, was proposed by IDS, seconded by the Chairman, and elected unopposed.

TEAM MANAGERS: The 3 incumbents, Dick Sutton, Luke Donnelly and Tum Carthew, were elected unopposed. Tum did warn that it would be a struggle to fulfil his duties if he went back to NZ. Bit of an over reaction to the All Blacks miserable RWC, which England won in Sydney.

HON. TREASURER: Bruce Jackson, incumbent, proposed by Rampant, seconded by IDS and elected unopposed. Having dispensed with the Enron doctrines of accounting he claims not to be attracted to the My Travel approach to accountancy for 2004. Only time will tell

HON. FIXTURES SECRETARY: IDS had left big shoes to fill and in a surprise move, possibly in consolation for England winning the Rugby World Cup, Merv "3 bats" Dillon was proposed by Roly Monk and seconded by Jacko. Despite there being no other nominations, the Chairman called for a vote and unusually Merv Dillon was elected unopposed unanimously. This rare error from the Chair was put down to too much of the rather splendid Chilean Cab Sav. Incidentally, Chile were one of a handful of South American Countries not to compete in this year's Rugby World Cup, won by England in Sydney.

HON. SECRETARY: Colin Bomber Dale had apparently agreed to stand once more on the condition that England never wins the Rugby World Cup again. To the strain of "4 more years" he was proposed by IDS seconded by Roly Monk and elected unopposed.

GOLF SECRETARY: Mr Rik, incumbent, was proposed by Rampant, seconded by IDS, and elected unopposed.

ORDINARY MEMBERS: There were 7 nominations, but probably because he failed to make the AGM with a lame excuse, Derek 4 hips Leckenby did not make the ballot paper. David Stocks was a clear winner with 9 votes and Steve Werren with 6 pipped IDS by 1 vote. Philip Challinor received zero votes. No change there then.

2003 STATS

Presented by Statto Werren, incidentally one of the 3 Nepos to witness England winning the Rugby World Cup in Sydney.

BATTING: In a great year for batting, 7 averaged over 30. Dick Sutton was 3rd and despite scoring almost 1000 for the season David Stocks was beaten into second place by Jackson for the umpteenth time.

BOWLING: The bowlers were almost as impressive with 4 taking more than 20 wickets. Dick Sutton took 23 at an average of 18, but was beaten by Bomber who took an amazing 38 at 14.8, with a wicket in every game he played.

NACA: Bomber 6, Tum and Roly 3, Luke Stoney and Stocks 2 each. As Bomber and Tum were absent from the AGM, Roly wore velvet on the evening. It suits him well.

QUIZ: Stoney won with a saddo train-spotting score of 14 out of 17.

Great season, great night, great club, who remain the mighty Nepotist Cricket Club

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2002                        (Report by Colin "Bomber" Dale)                          07 Dec 2002

HON. SECRETARY'S MINUTES: N.C.C. AGM 2002

Held at: The Coopers Arms, 87 Flood St, Chelsea, London SW3 5TB

"HIGH NEPO OF THE YEAR DRAMA LEAVES JACKO HOLDING THE BABY!!"

The climax of the prestigious Nepotists CC's night of nights - the vote for Nepo of the Year at the end of the AGM - has always been renowned for its tight finishes, ties and the dramas of vote-offs, sometimes with international calls deciding the result. But surely nothing has matched the scenes at the 2002 event at the Coopers Arms which saw the Honourable Treasurer dash out of the pub with one of sport's greatest honours under one arm and an almost new-born baby under the other!

Expecting-father Bruce Jackson got his priorities spot on when he left then over-due wife at home, so he could present his vitally important financial report to the members of cricket's greatest sport club. A couple of calls on the mobile confirmed all was fine and normal back in Kilburn as he presented his report to the gathering. Later after a dinner of traditional Christmas Turkey and few fine wines, the evening drew towards its climax. The Gay Victorian was again on his feet presenting the results of the Nepo quiz as a secret ballot for the Nepo of the Year was being conducted. Then came THAT call! "No, Bruce, you do not have time to finish the quiz by announcing Roly's 3 overs at Whitchurch went for 556 runs, no it is time rush back to Kilburn and get me to the hospital, and get me there fast!!"

An obviously excited but also quite embarrassed Jacko, made his apologies to the fine gathering of sportsmen, and immediately stood down to change into his bike gear as the first results of the ballot were announced. The vote was predictability close and seemed set to go to the wire. Stoney went to an early lead only to be joined by Dick on 3 votes. Roly made a run with 2 votes and then came the Gay Victorian! With one vote to be read he joined Robinson and Sutton on three votes a piece. The room went silent. The Hon. Treasurer, now fully in cycle kit with backpack on, delayed his rush to the stairs as Monk read the final vote: "Jackson!!" The Coopers Arms went berserk as the newly crowned N.O.T.Y. mounted his bike with the congratulations and best wishes of his fellow team-mates ringing in his ear.

Jacko's triumph was later reflected upon at by a bemused and broke Monk (who ended up distant 4th in the ballot) at the Hard Rock Casino: "I don't know, the lengths that some people will go to, to win a vote …"

Earlier, seventeen Nepotists arrived at this fine venue which hosted the AGM for the second year running. Chairman Lennon began the meeting and called up upon yours truly to go through point one on the agenda:

OFFICER'S REPORTS:

HON. SECRETARY:

I gave a brief review of the hard-working Nepotists Committee's previous meeting and the decision to put to the AGM a vote for a new position of "club captain" whose role it would be to phone pre-season many of the older members and recruit them for as many games as possible. The aim would be to build a team framework around the three match managers that could be completed week-by-week, so hopefully assist in the major problem they had been facing trying to get 11 players out each match.

HON. TREASURER'S REPORT:

Jacko boasted of "a whopping 66%" growth in subscriptions for the 2002 year over their 2001. This assisted in turning a previous loss into a profit of £537. "Credit must go to Bomber Dale who soberly fleeced, um, collected, much of the outstanding subs at last year's AGM," Jacko said. With a healthy bank balance now over £1000, Jacko stated that as Roly had avoided assassination in 2002 he had authorized him to purchase some kit. "At the same time, I should also tender my resignation, as Roly's past record with club money is somewhat patchy". Subs were to be unchanged at £40 for the players and £20 for social membership. However this year players were also going to receive FREE a Slazenger NCC branded cricket shirt worth £30 each with the payment of their £40 2003 subs.

HON. FIXTURE SECRETARY'S REPORT:

Stoney began by trying to back away for his tour comments of 2 years ago of how HSBC bank were a "horrible company" masquerading as his employers HFC Bank. However, as HFC have just been taken over by HSBC, he stated that his previous thoughts were a bit premature. He then notified the meeting of an extraordinary photo of the Hon. Treasurer in Friday's Evening Standard as the "people's choice" of internet share publications and how this photo brought disrepute to the club as he was the only "high management" person photographed wearing a Hawaiian shirt.

Stoney then reported that a massive 19 fixtures had already been booked for 2003 with the possibility of 22. Out were Teddington, Elstree and Bashers mob at St Albans. New were the "north London" side of Camberley. Back on the list was Wycombe House. The highlight being a "sub tour" at Oxford which involved a 4-team tournament and staying the Saturday night. Tour been moved back one week as it "clashed with Pamplona". The Mild May along with Budleigh and Holberton had been confirmed.

GOLF SECRETARY REPORT:

The Treasurer rose firstly to explain to the members that a golf secretary crisis had hit the club during 2002. A Guerney twin had been elected as secretary at last year's AGM, but "which one"?? "Who ever you look at, they always looking the f-ing same," the Treasurer pleated. Both Guerneys denied they were the actual secretary as result nothing had been done all year.

Therefore either or both Guerneys had been sacked and Mr Ric had been appointed as an interim golf secretary. Mr Ric announced that an early golf society had been booked for the "excellent" Camberley Heath for 28 March and a late summer's golf day was to be confirmed.

MERCHANDISE SECRETARY:

This new position has been held by "Arffur Daley" Monk who explained that apart from the shirts being bought by the club, new short and long sleeve jumpers had been ordered, as well as "universal fit" baggy lime green and magenta caps for £30 each. The catch was we have to order minimum 20 caps!

ELECTION OF OFFICERS FOR THE 2003 SEASON

CHAIRMAN: Peter "at least two games" Lennon. (incumbent) Elected unopposed on the condition he plays more matches than he has children.

CLUB CAPTAIN: Roly Monk voted into this new position.

TEAM MANGERS: Tim Carthew, Richard Sutton. (both incumbent). Elected unopposed.

A new team manager had to elected after the resignation of David Stocks, who was commended by members for his service over a number of years. The honour of the third manager has been given to Luke Donnelly who was elected unopposed.

HON. TREASURER: Bruce Jackson (incumbent). Elected unopposed.

HON. FIXTURES SECRETARY: Mark Robinson (incumbent). Elected unopposed. Stoney wanted it noted that it was noted that he would continue in this role to complete a 3-year term and was giving notice it was in the club's interest to hand it over in one years time. Noted Stoney. 4 MORE YEARS PLEASE!!

HON. SECRETARY: Colin Dale (incumbent). Elected unopposed.

GOLF SECRETARY: The interim golf secretary Mr Ric Andrew was elected officially to the position unopposed.

ORDINARY MEMBERS: A vote off! Results were: David Stocks 14, Derek Lec Leckenby 11 (both elected). Steve Werren 2. Allan Stamper 1.

2002 STATS

Presented by Jacko just before THAT CALL:

BATTING: In an appalling year for batting, we had just 3 qualified that averaged over 16. Jackson the winner in both averages and runs scored for the 75th year in a row.

BOWLING: In appalling year for bowling (did we win any matches?) only 3 bowlers took more than 10 wickets. Bomber Dale leading wicket taker for 2nd year in a row, Stoney taking the averages.

NACA: Bomber 3. Roly, Ric and Stocks 2 each.

Marvellous result. Marvellous night. Marvellous cricket club. We are the mighty Nepotists CC!!

PS: Mr and Mrs Jackson were pleased to announced the birth of the daughter Molly Louise on Sunday afternoon, September 8, 2002. Happy Birthday to both Scooby and Molly!!!

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2001                        (Report by Colin "Bomber" Dale)                          08 Dec 2001

HON. SECRETARY'S MINUTES: N.C.C. AGM 2001

Held at: The Coopers Arms, 87 Flood St, Chelsea, London SW3 5TB

Twenty-three Nepotists attended this gala event, held for the first time at the Coopers Arms. It turned out to be a fine venue with a with a large and classy (for the Nepos that is) upstairs function room. The food was not only eatable, but not thrown for the first time in Nepo history. Fine wines were also enjoyed.

Chairman Lennon began the meeting and called up upon yours truly to go through point one on the agenda:

Minutes of previous meetings:

I could have inserted a blank page in the agenda, because over the past 12 months your hard working committee had a total of 0.00 meetings! I blame the cheap wine at the 2000 AGM, as I only found out about my role when I saw my name on this year's fixture list.

Officers reports:

1. Hon. Treasurers: As our gay treasurer was trying to patch up his scam marriage in NYC, a written report was presented instead, showing a devastating £311 loss with the blame on the spending habits on one member alone: Roly Monk.

The Hon. Secretary presented the report. He added that by time he had finished fleecing subs and other assorted dosh out of the eager members in attendance, this loss could be reversed. (see Secretary's amended P+L report for further details).

2. Hon. Fixture Secretary: Stoney reported that 12 fixtures had already been booked for 2002. The master plan for all matches to be moved from London to the home counties was working well. Tour was sorted, same weekend as 2001 (deduct a day off the calendar). New fixtures for 2002: 1. The Postmodernists. 2 Shamley Green. 3: match against Basher Balden's staff. OUT: Bank of England (too many rate reductions) and Trailfinders.

Subscriptions 2001 outstanding and 2002

Hon Secretary vowed to get as much dosh off members tonight and then put the proposal for a separate social member fee and players members subs fee for 2002. This was carried, mainly on the back of the ancient old blokes who only turn up for the witty banter. It was later decided the fees would be £20 and £40. To qualify as social you play two or less matches in the season. Please see separate Secretary's report for further information on the collection of subscriptions on the night.

ELECTION OF OFFICERS FOR THE 2002 SEASON

CHAIRMAN: P. Lennon. (incumbent) Elected unopposed.

TEAM MANGERS: D. Stock, T. Carthew, D. Sutton. (all incumbent). Elected unopposed.

HON. TREASURER: B. Jackson (incumbent). Elected unopposed. Members refused to accept his resignation as secretary predicted actual profit this year.

HON. FIXTURES SECRETARY: M. Robinson. (incumbent). Elected unopposed.

HON. SECRETARY: C Dale. (incumbent). Elected unopposed.

GOLF SECRETARY: A vote (at long last). The incumbent Mr R Andrew v the young guns: D. Gurney (a low handicapper) and M Gurney. Elected: D Gurney.

ORDINARY MEMBERS: Another vote off! Results were: R Andrew 14 (elected). S. Werren 8 (elected). Others: M Gurney 5, M. Jones 3, R. Elliott 0.

Other business:

Dick Sutton nominated G. Lawes (absent from AGM) as "directions secretary" as he had an "A-Z brain", which was carried. Chairman asked DS to send GL a note regarding his appointment.

2001 statistics:

Naturally, there was a DELAY to this presentation, as the latest men in the world: S. Werren, H.O'Hara and A. Trilin arrived after 9pm for the 7pm meeting!! The "stato king" S. Werren, presented a 6 page spread-sheet (copies available from stato) with the highlights being:

BATTING:

Averages winner: B. Jackson 47 then G Lawes 40, D. Sutton 38, D. Stocks 33.1, A Monk 29.6, A Trilin 27, P Challiinor 26. T Carthew 23.8. C Leckenby 21.2, S Werren 18.3, D.Ellis 12.8 and H. O'Hara 11.8. Minimum 5 batting innings to qualify.

Runs scored: D Stocks 331. B Jackson 329. D Sutton 304, A Monk 237. S Werren 201.

BOWLING:

Averages winner: M Gurney 7.4. H O'Hara: 17.7. C. Dale 18.2. A Monk 18.9 A Trilin 22.5. R Andrew 27.2 (ONE MORE YEAR). M Robinson 30. D Sutton 41.7. 30 Over min.

Wickets taken: C Dale 23 (another superb year of lolli-pops!!). A Monk 19. H O'Hara 18, R Andrew 13. M Gurney 11. A Trilin 11. D Sutton 7. M Robinson 6.

Season stats: matches played: 16. Won 6, loss 5, drawn 5.

Runs scored 3000, conceded 2901.

Wickets taken 133, wickets lost 109.

Catches taken 63. Catches dropped 66!!!!! Most dropped H O'Hara 8.

NEPOTIST OF THE YEAR:

Final event of the night. Secret ballot was held and again it was a grandstand finish, however this year the proxy vote decider was not called upon.

THE WINNER, FOUNDER AND 2001 NEPOTIST OF THE YEAR IS … Steve Jones!!!! VOTING: S Jones 9, S Werren 8, M Jones 2, D Sutton 1, M Burke 1

Champagne flowed (compliments of Mr Jones) after the presentation of the jacket (kept for safe-keeping for winter by the Hon. Secretary).

Marvellous result. Marvellous night. Marvellous cricket club. We are the mighty Nepotists CC!!

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